Lavender Rain

I am honestly getting worried about this pregnancy. Many people have noticed that I seem to be losing weight, that I appear thinner than usual… I can’t really check my weight because we don’t have a scale here. I feel bad for my baby because I haven’t been paying much attention to this pregnancy. I have been too busy taking care of Zoe and my husband to even take care of my health and my unborn baby’s health. I must admit that every time there is nothing to eat here at home but instant noodles or canned foods, I end up not eating… I find them to be disgusting. Sometimes when I try to eat, I don’t finish even if I’m hungry. Perhaps I’m a picky eater, but sometimes I feel like I’m gonna throw up if I eat something I don’t like. I never had this problem with my first pregnancy. When I was pregnant with Zoe, sure, I did lose weight rapidly from hyperemesis but I gained weight as soon as I recovered from that disease.

I have been praying more about this baby. I just want a healthy baby. I hope that I gain weight the way I’m supposed to. Losing weight during pregnancy is scaring me… and I’m already on my second trimester, so I’m supposed to really start gaining those pounds.

So I went to my doctor’s appointment today because my lab results came back. As I had suspected, I do have urinary tract infection again for this pregnancy, but what I wasn’t expecting was the result of my blood test. According to the doctor, my hemoglobin count was low… so I am anemic… He told me not to worry about it, but to just keep taking my prenatal vitamins to get my iron. I guess it’s not that dangerously low. I know that I do feel the symptoms of being anemic — I constantly suffer from shortness of breath that I could feel my heart pumping harder. I will also need to eat more iron-rich foods, but I can’t have liver.

My husband and I purchased our first blu-ray movie last night, Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian. We bought our friend’s old PS3 for $250; the only thing is that it’s the model that has no backwards compatibility (doesn’t play PS2 games). Unfortunately, my husband just informed me last night that our PS2 is broken. I’m really sad about it, I dunno why. It’s rare for me to get attached to things like electronics… I guess I have a lot of memories with that PS2 because I did use to play a lot of video games with my siblings… I miss those days.

I have also been spending a lot of time making Wordpress themes, most of them I have made available for download here. I hope people will actually download it. I am still trying to figure out how to make a Live Demo… if you know how, give me a shout! Thank you! <3

I don’t really celebrate St. Patrick’s Day, but I have to come up with a title for this post. lol. Anyway, it’s been a while since I last posted. A lot has happened.

Zoe celebrated her first birthday last February with family and church friends. She also got to wear her traditional Korean dress for the first time. The dress is still a little too big for her, but she still looked so cute wearing it.

• We spent a week in LA to attend the World Financial Group convention. My husband just had to drag me along, but it was pretty interesting that they had all these big guest speakers there, like Ben Stein.
• We also just had to visit Disneyland in Anaheim. It was my second time there, but it was still fun, because I was with my family and it’s just fun to watch Zoe enjoy herself.
• I am also pregnant with my second child. I don’t know the gender of the baby yet. I will find out on my ultrasound appointment.

As I have previously announced, I got married in November and have been waiting for the professional photos to come in. Well, we received all our wedding pictures on a DVD and thought I’d share a few… These pictures were taken by the talented Lloyd Yoon of Night and Day Photography, along with his wife, Merry. These 2 are really awesome photographers and I’m glad that we had them as our wedding photographer. I can’t wait for our wedding album to come in.

[Show as slideshow]

For more pictures from the wedding, click here.

(CHRISTMAS RECAP)

• We spent Christmas Eve at my parents’ house, where Zoe was showered with many Christmas gifts. It must be nice being a little baby, because you are so popular and everybody gives you a gift even if you aren’t even close to them. I miss being a kid again.
• We then spent our Christmas day at Josh’s parents, had dinner but we left early.
• I kinda want to set up our own Christmas tradition, but since we are just starting our family, I think it’s also important to spend time with our immediate family… but hopefully someday in the future, we can develop our own tradition.

(RANDOM NEWS)

• I find myself reading a lot of Wikipedia articles. I don’t know why. They’re not always accurate, but a lot of the stuff on there are interesting. Wikis are fun.
• Also when I am bored, why do I keep reading the questions and answers on Yahoo! Answers? They are all a good laugh, for sure, but a lot of those questions are so stupid it’s not even funny.
• I am so proud of my husband. He hasn’t smoked in a week. He tried many times to quit in the past but this time, he seems to be doing well. I hope that he keeps it up. Another thing that I am happy about is that he is finally worship leading in church. God has blessed him with his talent in music and I’m glad he is using it for God.
• I am still trying to come up with my goals for 2009. So far, I only came up with one. And that is to continue working on my unfinished project — aka Vanity High.

It’s been a while since I blogged. I just really didn’t know what to blog about lately. I could’ve blogged about how sick I have been feeling since December, but I won’t get into that. Okay, I have to admit that I have been feeling bored and lonely being the only adult to supervise my daughter Zoe most of the day. I especially feel this way more when my husband works until late at night. I am just so exhausted by the time he gets back home past 9. I hardly get time to myself… I really don’t mind being home to take care of our daughter, but hate it when I have to wait for my husband to come home at 9pm. There are also those days when I just don’t feel like doing anything at all… but I know I have responsibilities. There are also other reasons that contribute to this, but that is a private matter.

So hubby and I still need to write down realistic and achievable goals for 2009. I’m still trying to come up with my New Year’s Resolution — one that has to do spiritually and physically and another “selfish” type of resolution. I am thinking that I deserve to have a day to myself once in a while. It would be nice to not think about parenting for a day.

I’m a horrible blogger/webmaster. I’m so bad at updating my site(s) — I should fire myself! lol. I haven’t been blogging/updating my sites, because of other distractions. Besides bing a busy mom, I also love to enjoy an activity with my husband. At night, we love to spend our time together playing World of Warcraft. It’s really how I keep my sanity. Being home all day with a baby too much isn’t good for me — I find that by spending a bit of time away from Zoe keeps me calmer. Last night, me and hubby sorta had a ‘date.’ But he doesn’t think it really counts. To me, it kinda did because we finally got a chance to go out alone without our baby. Hubby didn’t really think of it as a date, because we weren’t really alone together. The reason why we went out together was for a Christmas party from hubby’s work. We sat with other people at a table, so to him it’s not really a date… Still, we forgot about being parents for just a few hours and we got to enjoy each other’s company with no interruptions. It was really nice. It felt like we were dating again.

(GAMING) Now I digress… I am now going to talk about World of Warcraft (WoW). Hubby and I recently made Death Knights since installing the new expansion, Wrath of the Lich King (WotLK). Death Knights are so overpowered that I am loving it. Questing seems to go so much faster with a DK. Honestly, I don’t even know how to play this class properly. I still love my warlock, but hubby is really enjoying his DK so I’ve been leveling my death knight more often lately. Anyway, here’s a screenshot of our DK’s.

(POST-WEDDING) I can finally post! I know that it has been a while. Life has been hectic lately. As I mentioned in the previous entry, I just got married on November 15, 2008. It really was a beautiful wedding and I couldn’t have asked for more. I really was not expecting for things to turn out fine. I was actually expecting the worse. The hall not being set up on time, the photographers getting sick, me tripping as I walk down the aisle, etc… I pretty much was thinking of all the worse things that could go wrong. In the end, things turned out well. Not perfect, but that’s to be expected. I am really thankful that I am surrounded by people who are selfless and are willing to volunteer their time to help us. People who I never expected to help went out there and did so much more than I asked. I really can’t thank them enough.

(LIFE) How’s married life so far? To be honest, I don’t really feel much different. It isn’t a big change compared to becoming a mother and having a baby. I still feel the same. But I know that I do have more responsibilities. I’m no longer just a mother; I am also a wife now. I definitely feel like I have more to do at home. I feel like cleaning the house everyday is mandatory. Because of this thinking, I kinda felt overwhelmed… I have a 9-month old who loves to crawl everywhere. She picks up little things off the floor and eats it. She also loves to play with electronics. She is particularly fond of TV remotes. Yesterday, I woke up at 7 in the morning and first thing I did was the laundry. Then I made breakfast, changed Zoe’s diaper, routine, routine… Afternoon came and I realized that I didn’t even eat yet. So I tried to make myself food. It was impossible! She never let me get any cooking. What would’ve taken 20 minutes took me 4 hours to do. Zoe is growing through separation anxiety. I don’t know how other moms do it. I don’t know how they get things done… I for one have learned how to wash the dishes with one hand as I hold Zoe with the other, because she loves to watch me. I know that I can’t do that while I am cooking…

So by the end of the day, as I watched Zoe drift to sleep while nursing her, I began to think of this little baby that God blessed me with. As I watched her, I realized that I was too busy trying to get things done around the house. I was too busy trying to finish things. I realized that I didn’t even get to really spend my time just to play with her. I got too busy running around. Someday this little baby girl will grow into a beautiful woman… and someday she will leave home…. I should be enjoying every moment that I can while she is still young, while I can still hold her… I forgot the reason why I wanted to do this, why I wanted to be a stay at home mom… I want to see all the firsts, I want to be there as my children are growing up…. Because someday they are all going to grow… Someday they are going to leave us… The one who will stay with me for the rest of my life isn’t going to be my kids, but it’s going to be my husband. I know that I am trying to be a good housewife for Josh and for this family that we are building. I thought that I could do that by getting all the housework done. But it’s difficult. But I can still do my best. I just need to get my priorities straight. Deal with baby first before housework… — and of course it’s all about balance.

Anyway, I gotta go end this post now… but of course I’ll end it with pictures under the cut…

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This will be a quick post. Just wanted to say that I got married on Saturday, 15 of November. The wedding went really well and I have been called a “relaxed” bride.

Professional pictures are not available yet, so here’s one that a friend took.